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Rodney
Some people who stammer go to great lengths to pass as fluent. Find out why and read about the effects this can have.
On our page Stammering In A Fluent World, we talk about how it's not always obvious that someone has a stammer. This is because a lot of people who stammer find ways to minimise or hide it some or all of the time. One reason they might do this is to avoid any negative reactions they might get if they stammer.
They might:
- avoid using certain words
- scan sentences ahead in their mind for sounds they might stammer on
- substitute feared words for others that are easier to say
- try to hide a moment of stammering by pretending something else is happening
- say less
- Avoid certain situations they know they'll find difficult.
Some people go to great lengths so that no one finds out that they stammer. They'll be doing the things listed above so much so that you might not hear them stammer at all. They might 'pass' as a fluent speaker. This is sometimes called 'covert' stammering, or 'interiorised' or 'hidden' stammering.
Emotional effects
If someone's stammer isn't obvious, it can still be very much on their minds. Doing everything you can not to stammer can be hard work. It's the emotional side of things that's key here. The negative thoughts, feelings and constant work to hide the stammer.
Someone who is 'passing as fluent' even though they stammer might:
- have strong negative feelings about stammering
- worry that people will find out they stammer
- feel constantly on edge and stressed by the need to avoid stammering
- have few people in their life that know they stammer
- feel ashamed of what they see as their 'secret' stammer.
If you stammer and are passing as fluent, it can be hard for other people to understand how it makes you feel. People might reassure you that they never knew you stammered so it 'can't be that bad'. This can leave you feeling like you're making an unnecessary fuss.
In extreme cases you may have been so 'successful' in hiding it, people don't believe you stammer at all. This can be very frustrating and painful, as it effectively denies your experiences. Just because your stammer is hidden it doesn't mean it's not affecting you.
Pretending to be fluent was stressful and exhausting; it dominated my life and dictated what I did and didn't do.
Read Paul's story
Help & Support
Covert stammering is surprisingly common. You are definitely not weird. Or alone. Meeting other people who stammer, including those with covert stammering, can be life-changing. You can share experiences and build confidence among people who 'get it'. See Communities & Stammering Groups to see if there's something near you.
If it feels comfortable, call our free helpline on 0808 802 0002. Or start a webchat. All our volunteers either have a stammer or have a close connection to stammering.
If negative thoughts are impacting your life, another option is speech & language therapy. Speech & language therapists can help you address these feelings. See Options for Adults or Options for Children & Teenagers, which also mention courses that are available.
