Navigating coaching and youth work with a stammer

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Declan

Despite a difficult time at school, Declan Greenshields talks about the challenges he faces in his voluntary roles, as well as his experience of stammering in different languages.

Hi, I'm Declan. I am originally from Paraguay in South America but have lived in Swansea in Wales since I was adopted at 3 months old. I haven't been back to Paraguay since; I often wonder what my life would have been like with a stammer in Paraguay. 

My experiences in school and college were very mixed. I was bullied a lot, and I had many difficult days, weeks and months. I had to deal with a lot of name-calling, laughing, joking, pupils staring at me, mimicking my stammer and lots of pointing in my direction. I found this very upsetting and humiliating and, at times, I became very depressed. Sometimes it was difficult to see a way through, and I wondered long into the night if my life would be like this forever.

Coaching

Fast forward, and I am now a volunteer football coach which, as you can imagine, involves a lot of speaking and interaction with players and fellow coaches. When the players in my team first met me, they were confused and a little awkward as they possibly had never met anyone with a stammer before. It was a new experience for them. But over the years they have got used to me and how I speak, and they are patient with me. They know that I just take longer to get sentences out. 

In dynamic and fast-paced scenarios, I must speak quickly and make sure the players understand me before the moment has passed.

There are lots of challenges to navigate when coaching with a stammer. For instance, on matchdays when I coach players from the sideline, I know that I must get my words out in relation to the gameplay. In dynamic and fast-paced scenarios, I must speak quickly and make sure the players understand me before the moment has passed. This has taken a long time to manage.

I have worked with many teams and coaches at the club and the reaction regarding my stammer is positive. Generally, when I know that I am due to meet new players and coaches, there are a lot of nerves and anxiety, and lots of 'what ifs'. The fight or flight scenario usually kicks in, but this is something that I have managed to control. 

Youth work & languages

I am also a youth worker with the local council in Swansea. I work in different youth clubs around the city, which again involves a high volume of speaking and interaction with young people and fellow youth workers. The reaction to my stammer has been largely positive although it can take people a while to get used to, as again, they probably haven't met anyone with a stammer before. There have been difficult times when I've faced negative reactions, but I have been comfortable challenging it and educating the young people involved. All of this has been made easier by the support of my fellow youth workers. 

There have been difficult times when I've faced negative reactions, but I have been comfortable challenging it and educating the young people involved. 

I also speak a few languages. I'm not fluent in any of them but I have always found languages interesting. As a challenge, I began wondering how my stammer would be in a different language with all the different sounds, pronunciations and nuances. I found this part of my stammer very interesting and intriguing. I find some languages difficult, not due to the complexity of the language itself, but in relation to my stammer. When I speak Spanish, Greek or Guarani (the Paraguayan language), I find I stammer less than when I speak Welsh or German.

Socialising

When I go out socialising with friends there are interactions with bar staff, waiters and waitresses and other members of the public. This is something which has taken me a long time to manage and control. I am a way off fully managing and controlling this, as it can be quite hazardous — when drinks are flowing people can get too confident and say and do things that they wouldn't normally. But again, I have friends and work colleagues who are aware, and support me when they can without making a big deal out of it. I appreciate this so much. 

My advice for anyone else who stammers is to try not to worry. Don't worry if it takes you longer to get your words out — people who stammer have always got something interesting to say and it is worth the wait. Just take your time. You will have difficult days and difficult experiences, but you will also have good days and good experiences. You will get through the difficult ones. 

Good luck and make yourself proud.

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