Things you can do to help a young person who stammers.
Adolescence can be a difficult time for young people who stammer. As they're trying to find their own way in the world, the way they speak can add extra pressures.
They might feel more self-conscious about socialising, attracting others and starting relationships. They might worry about class presentations and oral exams. Or about how stammering might impact their career prospects. All this anxiety may make them avoid situations or withdraw.
Create space to talk
It can be hard for teenagers to talk about things that worry them. Let them know that it's OK to share their thoughts with you. If it feels right, talk openly with them about stammering and how they might be feeling about it. Be patient and create a safe space for them to talk.
Our support services
Alternatively, suggest that they talk with us. They can start a webchat or phone our free helpline on 0808 802 0002 (both are open Monday to Friday 10am-2pm and 4pm-8pm). All of our support service volunteers either stammer or have a close connection to it, so they know what it's like.
Talking about stammering
There's no perfect way to talk about stammering. Everyone has their own ways and times they want to talk about it with other people. But if you can be on the same page as your teenager, it gives you a way to have an open conversation with them if they need it.
Tell them that they are not alone. Maybe show them our Your Voice section, which has stories from other young people who stammer.
Being neutral
Try not to talk about stammering as something that's bad or shameful. This can reinforce any negative thoughts or feelings they may have about the way they speak. It could make them more anxious about talking, so that they try and avoid it or hide their stammer. This in turn can feed into their anxiety.
Try not to describe stammering as 'good' and 'bad'. For example, "Your speech has been really good today, you didn't stammer once!" or "Their stammering's been really bad this week".
Instead, use more neutral words to describe changes in stammering as 'more' or 'less'. For example, "You've been stammering more this week", or "They've been stammering less today". This gives you a way to talk about stammering without any judgement.
Focus on the positives
Help your teenager to understand that communication isn't about how fluently we speak. There are loads of people who stammer who are great communicators. Focus on what they are saying rather than how they say it.
Build up their confidence by reinforcing that stammering is not a limitation, nor is it something to be ashamed of. A growing number of people are proud to stammer (see What Is Stammering Pride?). Show them our page of Influential People Who Stammer, which has a list of actors, musicians, writers, broadcasters, sportspeople, industry leaders and influencers who stammer.
We've got lots of articles from young people who are getting on in their careers. You can also watch videos from 'Stambassadors', successful people talking about their stammers. These are made by Action for Stammering Children.
Getting help at school, college, uni & work
Download our guides for getting 'reasonable adjustments' below. They explain how your child, or you, can ask for changes at their school, college, university or workplace to make things easier for them.
Also, share our information pages on:
Our parent support group
We know that supporting a child who stammers can be difficult for those around them too. Why not come along to one of our online Parent 2 Parent support group meetings? Open to parents and guardians, they're a great place to chat, share experiences and get support.
Therapy & courses
If your teenager feels they need extra support, there are several options open to them.
There's one-to-one speech & language therapy on the NHS or privately. Or there are group therapy courses and other stammering courses. See our Children's Therapy & Courses page for details.
Each of these options can help address someone's negative thoughts and feelings. They can help teenagers grow in confidence and build resilience. They can also help them find ways to make speaking easier.
It's worth noting that therapy and courses are only worth doing if your teenager is fully on board. If they're not something they particularly want to do, they're unlikely to get much out of them.
Minecraft Club
If your teenager is 13 or 14, tell them about our online Minecraft Club. It's a place where young people can get together and play the popular game (for ages 7 to 14).
Creative Corner
Has your teenager made, or are they doing, something creative that's linked to stammering? If so, we'd love to share it in our Creative Corner. Poems, music, short stories, art projects, you name it, let us know. Email editor@stamma.org with details.
Your Voice articles
We've already mentioned our Your Voice section, which is packed with articles from young people about their experiences of school, friendships, dating, university, job hunting and much more.
Your teenager's welcome to write something too. See Submit Something For the Site or email editor@stamma.org for details.
If you would like to talk with us about anything on this page, call our free helpline on 0808 802 0002, start a webchat, or email help@stamma.org
